Adam and Eve virus

Takes a couple of bytes out of your Apple

Warren Beatty Virus

Constantly tries to prove its virility by attaching itself to younger or newer files.

Pat Buchanan Virus

Shifts all output to the extreme right of the screen

Bill Clinton Virus

Promises to give equal time to all processes: 50% to poor, slow processes; 50% to middle-class processes, and 50% to rich ones. This virus protests your computer's involvement in other computer's affairs, even though it has been having one of its own for 12 years.

Elvis Virus

Your computer gets fat, slow, and lazy and then self destructs, only to resurface at shopping malls and service stations across rural America.

Arnold Schwarzenegger Virus

Terminates and stays resident. It'll be back.

Sharon Stone Virus

Spreads quickly and easily.

Oprah Winfrey Virus

Your 200MB hard drive suddenly shrinks to 80MB, and then slowly expands back to 200MB.

Airline Virus

You're in Dallas, but your data is in Singapore.

AT&T Virus

Every three minutes it tells you what great service you are getting.

Congress Virus

Overdraws your disk space

Gallup Virus

Sixty percent of the PC's infected will lose 38 percent of their data 14 percent of the time (plus or minus a 3.5 percent margin of error).

Government Virus

Nothing works, but all your diagnostic software says everything is fine.

Microsoft PowerToxin®

List: $500. License: $499/machine:- (entitles you to legally copy and crash on one machine).

MCI Virus

Every three minutes it reminds you that you hate paying too much for the AT&T virus.

Neutron Virus

Eliminates all documents and applications, but leaves the folders intact.

Nike Virus

Just does it.

Quantum Leap Virus

One day your PC is a laptop, the next day it is a Macintosh, then a Nintendo.

Right to live virus

Won't allow you to delete a file, regardless of how old it is. If you attempt to erase a file, it requires you to first see a counselor about possible alternatives.

Texas Virus

Makes sure it's bigger than any other file.

 

Collected from various sources